Something Borrowed, Something BLUE. What’s Behind, “Sad Bride Syndrome”?


Not all brides are blissful after the wedding day.  Recent reports indicate a startling rise in post-wedding depression among some brides.  Although the old rhyme says “something borrowed, something blue” it’s hard to imagine that’s what the verse is referencing.

According to The Science of Relationship Blog  a new study suggests that are three factors that potentially set new brides up to be “blue brides.”

Difference 1: It’s all about me.

Blue brides, compared to happy brides, were far more likely to view the wedding as “my day” and all about what they wanted, and were focused on not letting anything stand in their way of getting what they want. In fact, some of the blue brides even referred to their guests as “intruders” – people that were mucking up “my day”. In contrast, happy brides saw the wedding as a celebration for everyone, and were more concerned for and considerate about the measures others took to be there to celebrate. Happy brides also viewed the wedding as simply a step or formality to getting married – the focus was on life after the wedding.

Difference 2: What now?

Blue brides were more uncertain about what life and marriage has in store for them after the wedding compared to happy brides. Specifically, blue brides were unsure of how they were supposed to behave as a spouse/wife, worried about whether they made a mistake by marrying in the first place, and weren’t sure about whether their expectations for married life were realistic. Happy brides did not report such uncertainty.

Difference 3: The end or the beginning?

Not surprisingly, blue brides, given their “me” focus on the wedding, saw the conclusion of the wedding itself as an ending. Happy brides saw the wedding as the beginning of the rest of their lives with their partners. Thus, blue brides view the end of their weddings as a loss rather than a gain, which is not a particularly promising way to start a marriage.   READ THE REST OF THE STORY

Making a successful transition from singleton to twosome can be challenging, especially at a time when so many newly marrieds come from  single-households, divorced households and other family arrangements that did not give them the opportunity to witness healthy marriage habits lived out in the day-to-day. The good news is that couples don’t have to struggle regardless of what their family and relationship history might be.  Research clearly shows that the habits that separate marriage masters from marriage disasters can be taught and with a little practice, every couple that is willing to learn can turn a marital miss into marital bliss.  If you’d like to discover the habits can help you create a joy-filled, life long love, check out Just Married: The Catholic Guide to Surviving and Thriving in the First Three Years of Marriage,    For Better…FOREVER! The Catholic Guide to Lifelong Marriage, and  When Divorce is NOT An Option: How to Heal Your Marriage and Nurture Lasting Love.

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