Ever had one of those mornings when nothing goes right? Your coffee spills, your kids are squabbling before breakfast, and your dog decides the rug looks better with a new chew-hole design. Then, you spend ten minutes looking for your keys and end up being late for your appointment. It’s the sort of start that could foul anyone’s outlook for the rest of the day.

But maybe it doesn’t even take that much to put you in a negative mood. Maybe you have a more “melancholic” personality, or you struggle with depression.

Whatever the cause, having a negative mindset never makes the day go better; in fact, it’s more likely to make things worse.

So, how do you break out of that negative mindset so you can navigate the day’s challenges with peace—and even a touch of joy?

Judi Phillips, a pastoral counselor with the Pastoral Solutions Institute, suggests what she calls “glimmers” as one antidote for life’s daily stresses.

Wait, What Exactly Is a Glimmer?

Let’s revisit the rough morning that we just described. If you look a little closer, you might just spot some “glimmers of goodness”: one of those squabbling kids spontaneously gives you the tightest hug; the dog (the mischievous rug designer), looks up at you with unconditional love. Outside, the sky is an amazing shade of blue, a welcome relief after a week of overcast skies.

These are glimmers—simple moments of goodness that, once you notice them, have the power to shift your mood from gloomy to grateful.

“The idea is that when we’re purposeful and intentional in looking for those glimmers, we begin to have a shift in our mindset,” Phillips says. “We begin to experience life in a more joyful way than if we’re just stuck in the negative, or if we’re stuck in the worries of things.”

Rewiring Your Brain’s Negativity Bias

One reason it can feel easier to focus on the negative is that our brains come hardwired to notice what’s wrong and to highlight bad experiences. That trait helped humans avoid predators and other threats for hundreds of thousands of years. But today, rather than keeping us alive, this negativity bias tends to make us stressed, anxious, and frankly, pretty cranky.

But neuroscience research shows that practicing gratitude literally reprograms our brains. “Anxiety can’t coexist with gratitude,” Phillips says. “When we’re intentionally grateful, our brain shifts its focus and literally starts seeing life through a new lens.”

At the biological level, looking for these “glimmers of goodness” gradually strengthens our brain’s “glimmer-spotting” neural pathways so that, eventually, this more positive outlook becomes a habit.

The beauty of glimmers is that they don’t have to be major wins. “For someone wrestling with clinical depression, just getting out of bed or brushing their teeth can be a genuine glimmer,” Phillips notes. It’s these tiny celebrations that spark a more positive outlook, step by incremental step.

Glimmers of God’s Presence

There is a spiritual dimension at work in this practice, too, Phillips says, in that these glimmers connect us to God.

“It can help us to recognize God’s presence with us, because we know that God is the one who ensures any good thing,” Phillips says. “And so anytime we’re experiencing goodness, that is evidence of God being there with us.”

Connecting with God in these little ways throughout the day can provide us with the grace we need to overcome nearly any challenge. Just consider the various heroes of the Nazi concentration camps: Venerable Angela Maria Autsch, known as the “Angel of Auschwitz,” uplifted fellow prisoners with her humor and kindness. Blessed Franciszek Dachtera maintained such a cheerful demeanor despite being subjected to tortuous medical experiments, other prisoners nicknamed him “Cherubnik.” Similarly, Venerable Emil J. Kapaun ministered to his fellow prisoners of war in North Korea with a sense of humor.

These people were able to rise above really awful circumstances not on their own, but because of their deep relationship with God—and their ability to recognize God present and working even amid great evil. Of course this does not mean that we “should just be happy” in the midst of difficulty, but recognizing God in our situation helps us to navigate the difficulty and take healthy action in a more peaceful and effective way. 

Getting Started Spotting Glimmers

So, these glimmers sound great—but how do you get started, especially if your default mindset tends to be negative?

Phillips recommends making it a daily habit to write down a list of glimmers from the day. Choose a time that is connected with some other habit: eating a meal, brushing your teeth, getting ready for bed.

“Keep a notebook by your bed, or near your toothbrush,” she suggests. “Make it as easy as possible.”

Do this at least once a day—or more often, if you can.

At first, you might struggle to come up with even a handful of glimmers in a day. Or you might find yourself repeatedly thankful for coffee, chocolate, or Netflix (no judgment). But Phillips challenges clients to be specific and varied. If you thanked God for coffee yesterday, try something new today—maybe the quirky barista who made your morning brighter.

You can put a fun twist on this assignment by writing each day’s glimmers on colorful Post-it Notes that you then post on a door, refrigerator, or somewhere else you’ll see them regularly.

A Life-Changing Habit

Phillips has seen this practice bring about dramatic change in the lives of her clients.

“It’s incredible,” she says. “It’s like a night and day difference. Those who begin to practice it and are faithful to it, they just report being more happy in their lives, they report a greater awareness of God being with them and having a sense of his presence with them day in and day out. 

“Also, even if they hit a place where they’re having difficulty…they’re much better able to manage it without falling in a ditch, so to speak, where they go back down in that really dark place. So there’s a huge payoff to practicing it.”

And the best part? The more you practice, the easier it gets. “After a few months, people go from naming just one or two glimmers a day to noticing dozens,” she adds.

So here’s your mission: tonight, before bed—or tomorrow morning while brushing your teeth—take two minutes to jot down at least three glimmers from the past 24 hours. No repeats! It could just change your life.

And if you find yourself needing a little extra help along the way—especially if you’re dealing with persistent negativity, anxiety, or depression—reach out to Judi Phillips and or any of our pastoral counselors at CatholicCounselors.com.

Because, really, life is way too short to miss out on those tiny, wonderful glimmers of joy.