Three Ways to Stop Settling and Live the Life You Were Meant to Live

Do you want more from your life? Are you struggling with dissatisfaction in your life or relationships? You’re not alone. We were created for more, yet our fallen nature often causes us to settle for less or holds us back from aspiring for more. But the good news is, there are ways to break this habit and live the life we are meant to live!

Theology of The Body reminds us to stop settling.  To see that God wants to fulfill the deepest longings of our heart for a love that doesn’t fail, for relationships that are fulfilling, and for a life that reflects the glory of his grace.  Pope St John Paul the Great reminded us that we must keep our eyes, not on what we see in front of us when we look at our broken world and our broken lives, but on what God sees when he looks at us and what God wants to make of our lives and relationships so that his glory could be known in the world through our lives.  The truth that will set us free is the truth God sees when he looks at our lives.  Our job is to stand up to to our doubts and fears and lean into the vision that God has for us instead so that we can become what we are.


Do you want more from your life? Check out:

The Life God Wants You To Have

Discovering the Divine Plan When Human Plans Fail


Here are three ways to stop settling and live the life you are meant to live:

1.Get Your Binoculars–We tend to settle because we get so caught up in the frustrations of the present that we lose sight of the destination to which God is leading us; Namely, a life and relationships that are healthy, whole, and holy.  Stop settling for what is in front of you.  Get your binoculars and look to the horizon line.  Keep imagining what a healthier, whole, and holier life and relationships would look like and start walking toward that.  Sometimes it will seem impossibly hard.  No Matter.  Trust that God’s grace will make up for what you lack and start walking.

2.Take Small Steps–We often settle for surviving because we can’t see ways to make the big changes that need to happen.  Remember, big journeys are made up of a million little steps.  Ask yourself, “What is one small thing I can do today to make the change I want to see in my life?”  Do that, and then ask that question again, and again, and again. Each time, remember that you are fighting against the temptation to survive and, instead, learning to cooperate with God’s grace to live life more abundantly.

3.Turn On Your GPS–We tend to settle when we feel lost.  But there is no reason to ever feel lost if you have your GPS, your GOD POSITIONING SYSTEM–that is, PRAYER.  When you feel lost and find yourself giving into the temptation to survive in your life or relationships, ask God to help you make the turns you need to make to get back on the path to wholeness, health, and holiness that he wants you to be walking.  Just like with a regular GPS, chances are, it will only take a few simple turns for God to get you back on the path.

If you want more information on how to overcome the frustrations in life and stop settling, visit us online at

Are You Thriving? 5 Ways YOU Can Live A Fuller Life.

Self-help books (including a couple of my own–see here and here) often talk about thriving versus merely surviving but have you ever wondered what it takes to really thrive?

Jesus said, “I came that you might have life and have it more abundantly” and I would argue that he was referring to both eternal life and life in the present.  Secular psychologists use the term “thriving” for what Christians might call an “abundant life”–at least this side of Heaven.    In fact,  researchers have identified 5 traits that correspond with living life to the full.

1. Hedonic Well-Being–has to do with how much satisfaction and enjoyment  you get from your life.  If you know how to enjoy yourself in healthy ways, have a good sense of humor, have compelling hobbies and interests, and take pleasure in the simple joys of daily life, you can be said to have a healthy degree of “hedonic well-being.”

2. Eudaimonic Well-Being–involves feeling like you are living a meaningful and purposeful life.  If you feel that you are making a positive difference with your life, can identify the small ways you are making the world a better place by your presence or efforts, and have a sense that at least certain people are better off because you are in their life, you may be exhibiting a strong sense of “Eudaimonic Well-Being.”

3. Psychological Well-Beinghas to do with having  a healthy, positive view of oneself combined with the absence of any mental health symptoms or disorders.  If you like who you are as a person, feel good about your ability to set and meet positive goals in your life, and don’t exhibit psychological/emotional problems that negatively impact your ability to function well in your work, roles, and relationships, you probably exhibit a high degree of “Psychological Well-Being.”

4.  Social Well-Being–involves having meaningful connections to people you care about and who care about you.  If you  feel that you can have faith in other people, that others are basically trustworthy,  if you are affirmed by a group that shares your values and beliefs, and feel generally cared for by the people who share your life, you probably have a high degree of Social Well-Being.

5. Physical Well-Being–  As you might guess, Physical Well-Being refers to your physical strength and health.  If you are physically fit, at a good weight for your height, are able to maintain appropriate activity levels, and are physically capable to doing all the activities that are important to you, you probably exhibit a high degree of Physical Well-Being.

Very few people have achieved well-being across all five areas associated with thriving, but the degree to which  you can say you exhibit at least some of each of these 5 categories of well-being is the degree to which you can say that you are thriving in your life, rather than just surviving it.

Beyond being a measure of the degree to which a person is thriving, these categories can be very useful in helping you determine which areas to focus on in order to achieve greater fulfillment in your life.  Which areas are you strongest in?  Which areas would you like to make improvements?

If you would like to learn more about how you can thrive in every area of your life and relationships, contact the Pastoral Solutions Institute Tele-Counseling Practice (740-266-6461) to speak with a counselor about how you can start living a more abundant life today!